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Wednesday, 23 April :: Link
 She seems funny! Tuesday, 22 April :: Link
Anonymous asked: would you rather eat at Ray BBQ (Friday Night Lights) or Freddy's BBQ Joint (House of Cards)? Freddy’s went bankrupt. So I guess Ray’s by default. Monday, 21 April :: Link
Anonymous asked: If I order Bitchface will you autograph it? Yeah sure why not Saturday, 19 April :: Link
“My Jewish lawyers have advised me to say that I do not support, nor would I ever actually fund, a cum assault on any sitting US Senator. These comments were said in jest and should not be taken seriously. Please do not fling anything, even cum, at Ted Cruz’s face. Thank u”
— Last night, readers of the conservative garbage heap known as Twitchy.com got very butthurt over a tweet I wrote about flinging cum on Sen. Ted Cruz’s face. So here’s the response I crafted with the help of my Jewish lawyers.
Thursday, 17 April :: Link
 Everyone is making fun of Drake for these photos, but honestly I’d act like this if I had courtside tickets to a D-League game. Wednesday, 16 April :: Link
 Tumblr is pretty chill. Anonymous asked: Do birds fuck? Or does the male bird just jizz all over the eggs after the female has laid them? Great question, anonymous. I wish I had an answer for you. I feel like your best move is to ask that question to the people at http://birdfuck.tumblr.com/, which is a real website somehow Saturday, 12 April :: Link
Anonymous asked: Your Nick Cannon memes are NOT funny. They're stereotypical and distasteful. Yeah, I know. They’re direct quotes from his stand up, idiot. Friday, 11 April :: Link
 "Please don’t make me clickbait." |
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